Mutant Pizza

PANEL ONE
Cat plays on their portable gaming console.
CAT: I love free-to-play games! They’re free!
DOG: As long as they aren’t pay to win, right?

PANEL TWO
The oak tree raises an eyebrow at Cat, silently listening to their conversation.
CAT: Well, yes and no.
DOG: Elaborate.

PANEL THREE
Cat’s gaming console vacuums up some paper money.
CAT (Off Panel): When I have money to blow, I love pay-to-win games.

PANEL FOUR
In a video game, Cat is large with beefy tank treads for legs and a bazooka trained at a helpless rabbit, who’s only armed with a stick. The Rabbit gulps, awaiting their demise.
CAT (Off Panel, Cont.): There’s nothing like the feeling of buying an overpowered item to destroy my enemies.
CAT (Off Panel, Cont.): Especially when they’re too poor to fight back.

PANEL FIVE
Back to Cat and Dog under the tree.
CAT: But when I’m as broke as a mangy mutt…
DOG: Hey!
CAT (Cont.): …I hate when it’s pay-to-win.

PANEL FIVE
A rabbit sits at their computer in their ‘basement’ rabbit den, drinking something from a can while pressing a key without even looking. The rabbit’s monitor vacuums up some paper money.
CAT (Off Panel): There’s no skill involved in some basement dwelling edgelord just paying a bunch of money on some unfair weapon instead of getting good at the game.
CAT (Cont.): They should feel embarrassed to even exist!

PANEL SIX
Back to Cat and Dog under the tree.
DOG: You don’t see the irony in that?
CAT: No, and I completely refuse to…Now give me your credit card.

PANEL SEVEN
Dog sighs and boomerangs their credit card around the tree to Cat.

PANEL EIGHT
Cat’s gaming console catches and eats the credit card, loudly declaring “Transaction Complete.” Dog is haunted by their bank account slipping further and further into the red.

The end.