Mutant Pizza

PANEL ONE
Glott and Terry sit under the tree.

GLOTT: HEY, YOU MIGHT KNOW THE ANSWER TO THIS. I WAS PILLAGING THIS GUY’S HOUSE THE OTHER DAY AND WE GOT TO TALKING ABOUT THE ECONOMY AND HE WAS LIKE “WELL, IT’S ALL MADE UP ANYWAY.”

TERRY: …WHAT’S YOUR QUESTION?

PANEL TWO

GLOTT: WHAT THE HELL DOES THAT MEAN?

Closer on Terry. He holds a finger up to accentuate his point.

TERRY: AH.
GLOBAL ECONOMIES RUN ON SOMETHING CALLED “FIAT CURRENCY,” OR MONEY THAT ISN’T BACKED BY PRECIOUS METALS OR OTHER TANGIBLE GOODS. INSTEAD, A CENTRAL BANK LOANS OUT MONEY AND ISSUES BONDS, KINDA LIKE LOANS, WITH INTEREST.
THE ENTITY THEN MAINTAINS PURCHASING POWER BY CONTROLLING THE AMOUNT OF MONEY IN CIRCULATION.

PANEL THREE
The Tree silently looks on with haggard eyes.

GLOTT: WHAT KIND OF NEW FANGLED NONSENSE IS THAT?

TERRY: THE FIAT SYSTEM IS ACTUALLY QUITE OLD, DATING BACK TO THE TTH CENTURY IN GOBLIN CHINA. WHICH, AS YOU KNOW, IS THE COUNTRY OF CHINA THAT IS POPULATED ENTIRELY BY GOBLINS.

PANEL FOUR
Glott is seduced by the idea of making more money.

GLOTT: SO WAIT, DOES THAT MEAN THAT WHEN I GROW BORED OF MY LOOT AND SELL IT, THE MONEY’S WORTH IS BASED ON THE AMOUNT OF OTHER MONEY FLOATING AROUND?
SO I SHOULD ALSO PILLAGE ALL THE MONEY, AND THEN ONCE I’VE HOARDED A BUNCH OUT OF CIRCULATION, THE ITEMS I SELL WILL BE WORTH A BUTTLOAD!

PANEL FIVE
Glott and Terry under the tree again.

TERRY: THAT’S NOT QUITE–

GLOTT: YOU KNOW, YOU’RE WASTED ON MARKETING. YOU SHOULD BE A FINANCIAL PLANNER.

TERRY: HMM. IS THAT A COMPLIMENT? I’M GOING TO TAKE THAT AS A COMPLIMENT.

THE END.